Restarting routines

I am a creature of habit. And I know what they say about routines cutting down on decision fatigue, but really, my days are all the same because that’s the way I like it.

Surprises? No thanks.

Our lives have been, shall we say, a bit on the rogue side lately, with routine completely out the window. And that’s been hard. So this past week, the focus was settling back into normal life. And I mostly succeeded. I worked a full week and managed to cross a few projects off my list. While I didn’t do any FlyLady zones as planned, I did get some general cleaning done, which always makes me feel better. The sun was out and I took lovely lunches out on our deck, soaking it up with an army of cats.

There were a few glitches, like there always are: Jo called in the middle of a coffee date because she wasn’t feeling well and needed me to pick her up from school; not a glitch, just that my grandma was in town and I visited with her instead of doing all that other stuff that needed to be done (eh, sometimes the ol’ list can wait); and everywhere I went, people wanted to ask about my father-in-law and how the family is doing, which comes from a good place on their end, but it’s exhausting retelling the story over and over.

Part of my morning routine involves writing — getting out my planner and seeing what’s on the docket for the day, as well as my main journal to process thoughts and feeling and whatever happened the day before. I’ve been resisting this for the past three weeks, although the rest of my routine is fairly solid. I rarely reread what I write, so it’s not that I am afraid of bogging my future self down with bad memories. I think it’s more denial. Once I write it, it’s real.

This week I’d like to get back on track with ALL of my morning routine … and my evening routine, which I haven’t bothered with for quite some time. I’ve also completely stopped my walk break routine at the office, and that’s going to be a priority as well.

I want to feel normal again, that’s why. I want to feel in control. And I don’t see how that could be a bad thing.

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4 thoughts on “Restarting routines

  1. sarahn says:

    I recently forced myself to journal; when I was having an up moment, knowledgeable that I usually write when I’m down. Usually the emotions from a bloke or another…

    I’m glad to hear you getting back into your routines!

    Like

  2. Roberta says:

    Getting back to routines can be hard on their own. It …almost feels like a rejection of the grieving process, or the grief itself. But the grief goes away on it’s on time, not according to how actively you sit shiva.

    I still have my nephew’s phone contact in my phone. It seems too permanent to delete that. I sympathize with why you are having difficulty journaling right now. Would it be easier if you start journaling what *is* happening instead of what has happened, and wait to process your grief verbally when it is no longer so raw?

    Hang in there. Whatever gets you through the day is a good thing.

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    • Trisha Walker says:

      Today’s journal entry was about what I hoped to accomplish today, i.e. routines (walk break, check! Lunch break, check! Kitchen zone, check!). My grief is mingled with gratitude because my father-in-law did not suffer after the initial fall — his death was peaceful and we all got to say goodbye. Plus it’s possible I haven’t 100 percent accepted it yet — or maybe that I have, just that I forget and then am continuously remembering.

      As to your nephew’s phone number, I think that’s nice. I kept my friend’s husband’s until I got my new phone. But it had been a couple of years by then and I felt like I could finally let that go. It’s tough, though. I can sympathize with that.

      Oh, grief.

      Like

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